TMNT

• Written and Directed by Kevin Munroe (Feature Directorial Debut)
• March 17, 2007 (Grauman’s Chinese Theatre) / March 23, 2007 (US) / March 29, 2007 (Hong Kong)
• Based on characters created by Kevin Eastman and Peter Laird

Voice Cast

• Narrator-Laurence Fishburne
• Casey Jones-Chris Evans
• April O’Neil-Sarah Michelle Gellar
• Splinter-Mako Iwamatsu and Greg Baldwin
• Raphael-Nolan North
• Leonardo-James Arnold Taylor
• Michelangelo-Mikey Kelley
• Donatello-Mitchell Whitfield
• Cook-Kevin Smith
• Max Winters/ Yaotl-Patrick Stewart
• Colonel Santino-John DiMaggio
• General Aguila-Kevin Michael Richardson
• General Serpiente-Paula Mattioli
• General Gato-Fred Tatasciore
• Karai-Ziyi Zhang

An immortal general seeks to open a portal to another reality and the Turtles must come back together to stop him.

TMNT drops you right in the middle of this film’s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle universe. There is no set up. Whether a sequel or a film unto itself, every movie needs a little something to aid either the uninitiated or remind returning viewers and the opening narration does very little to help.

While I am okay with a lived-in world, this is TOO lived in. The story even picks up after the defeat of The Shredder (though he is hinted to still be alive at the end). I am not requesting an in-depth origin film but rather set up to know where the characters stand. April O’Neil and Casey Jones are dating AND running some kind of antiquities business. Leonardo is off in Central America training (?) and the other Turtles all got their own thing going rather than fighting crime.

The characters never get built enough that you care that much about them. And they seem to be relying on previous familiarity with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles to get you through that but these are not the Turtles that everybody is familiar with. At least not the ones that generally dominate popular culture. 

The main thrust of the story is an immortal character Yaotl having taken the identity of business mogul Max Winters seeking to end his curse of immortality as well as turn his generals from statues back into humans. He gets portrayed for much of the movie as the general bad guy until there is a bait and switch where he’s not the villain but the people he’s trying to lift their part of the curse off of are bad. Yet honestly given the disposition of Yaotl/Winters at the very end I really can’t blame them for double crossing him. He made some pretty huge decisions for them on their part, and given what happened to him when the curse is finally lifted they may not have been completely in the wrong if in the wrong at all.

As curses go this one does not seem too bad. Winters has immortality and as of this story he has developed a technology which allows his generals to live again. Given a bit more time it looks like he could overcome it all without raising the kind of ruckus he does here.

The opening narration of TMNT blunts everything that followed. There are no surprises or twists. Everything that it mentioned was pretty much covered with dialogue and action so the turn of Winters as an immortal general who has been a significant player in history for the past 3,000 years was “Meh.”

If you’re expecting this to be fun and bouncy think again. While it’s not a serious Debbie Downer much of the focus is on the troubled relationship between Michelangelo and Raphael. My knowledge of the Turtle’s comics is limited to some random gets from polybags, but the portrayal comes off as needlessly antagonistic even by the standard of what I can recall.

As a movie, this is far too short. There are plenty of good ideas and great elements to be sure, but with its limited run time they have to move through much of it at breakneck speed, or hand it to you with some serious exposition rather than let it unfold on screen. When we get actual narrative rather than exposition, it’s mostly good. They aim for a character driven and it does get that more often than not.

Despite becoming a fate of the world story at the end, it never feels like one. They bring you to the edge of that feeling but quickly pull back. It’s not because of any humor or anything like that. It just never pushes it any further. They play it too safe.

This is CGI animation and it has not aged particularly well for the most part. What was pricey and high-end then looks cheap today. Jimmy Neutron looks as good now as this does and it was made for television.

TMNT is not bad but it’s not great. With a rushed narrative and poor characterization, it’s a weaker film than it should be given the basics. I don’t think you’ll be necessarily disappointed if you watch it, but you may not walk away super thrilled.