Machete Kills

• (Also known as Robert Rodriguez’s Machete Kills)
• Directed by Robert Rodriguez
• September 19, 2013 (Austin Fantastic Fest) / October 11, 2013 (US)

The legendary Machete is recruited by the U.S. President to stop an arms dealer and a Mexican revolutionary.

I have an undeniable love for Danny Trejo. There’s just something about him. No matter what he does he comes off as a true badass. Not in some brutish or violent way. Rather he has that quality of genuine toughness within him and he is able to bring that to the forefront. Or maybe it’s just because he loves what he does. Whatever it is, Danny Trejo brings the goods whenever he performs. No matter how bad the movie looks his presence helps me to consider watching it when he’s there. 

Not that I needed much help watching Machete Kills after having seen Machete. The original was a violent and over-the-top action film that reveled in its grindhouse inspiration. Machete Kills is just as violent and absurd. It has some extremely random casting that works much better than it has any right too. We have the likes of Walton Coggins, Cuba Gooding Jr., Lady Gaga, Carlos “Charlie Sheen” Estevez, and Sofía Vergara among others all in the same film. And they’re all enjoying themselves and clearly having fun with the silliness.

And who can forget Mel Gibson as Luther Voz who is deliciously evil in this movie? Though it occurs with extreme rarity as far as I can tell, he is such a great villain actor. Regardless of what you think of him outside of film, the man has talent and here it is on full display as what ultimately amounts to the main threat of the story. Voz (inspired by Elon Musk who has a cameo) is a psychic industrialist planning on destroying the world and manipulates events to that end.

Demián Bichir is Mexican revolutionary Marcos Mendez who goes from nice guy to crazed villain because of multiple personalities. He is adequate as the nice guy but so very good when he goes pure evil. Just that kind of crazy that makes the baddie more appealing than the hero. He has a missile aimed at Washington with a Deadman’s switch wired to his heart.

Perhaps this is a bit of accidental meta casting but Amber Heard plays “Miss San Antonio” Blanca Vasquez who is Machete’s handler for the Mendez Mission but in reality works for Voz in order to win a pageant. Something about that and her general performance screams at what came later with Johnny Depp. No poops on a bed here but something feels connected.

This is just full-on kinetic action that hits the ground running and only picks up speed. It’s just crazy and bonkers and throws element after element at you. It gives everything the minimal amount of time for each new thing to breathe before hitting you with something else.

And as with the last one it does have a little something to say. But it doesn’t beat you over the head with that message. First and foremost it is there to tell story. Rodriguez and Company are most assuredly supportive of individuals crossing the border. Plus they have no love for those who take the opposite view. The beauty is even if you don’t support their views, you can still enjoy this film and not feel as if you’re being lectured to over something.

Despite the bonkers story and the bonkers nature of many of the elements, the narrative perceives rather logically with an unexpected element of intelligence. A built on B built on C and so forth. And, given the almost cartoonish nature of some things in this, the silliest elements don’t come off as illogical. And it helps that the characters are established and proceed as you would expect. There are no out of left field changes. 

There are plenty of nods to science fiction-especially Star Wars which have bothered some critics. The thing is this direction was pretty well laid out early in the previous film. There are references such as a character getting frozen ala Han Solo and weapons that look suspiciously like lightsabers among others. Plus the costumes are a throwback to old-school science fiction with those weird pads on the shoulders. I have no idea what they are even called but you could see things like that in Flash Gordon cartoons and movie serials. 

Machete Kills is a fantastic sequel, and one that improves on the concept. It’s one of those things that for whatever reason didn’t click with audiences but should have. If you wanna have a good time and simply enjoy yourself, this is the movie to watch!