Night of the Tommyknockers

• Original title Tommyknockers
• Directed by Michael Su
• November 25, 2022 (US)

Miners in the 1870’s blasting for gold accidentally release ancient creatures that dwell underground.

Night of the Tommyknockers (original title Tommyknockers) is rough from the start. The opening scene that is meant to terrorize the viewer and to set the tone is poorly done. The acting is rough (that’s if you can call it acting). It looks like bad comedy with exaggerated facial expressions. When we get to the meat of the film it gets so much worse. You know you’re in deep trouble when Richard Grieco playing the outlaw leader Dirk is your best featured actor. I am not calling him terrible, but he is one of two featured namable people. The other being Tom Sizemore as Marshal Steed. Sizemore just does not care. But the issues go far beyond any of this.

Time seems to have no meaning in this movie. Or maybe there was nobody monitoring for continuity. It bounces around from day to night at supersonic speed in this movie leaving the viewer with no concept of the passage of time. One moment it is daylight and a line or two later the sun has set and there is a big spotlight to the left illuminating the action.

The monsters look borrowed from a Halloween attraction. Static masks and poses that would cause stress on the strongest of backs. Far from impressive. Blood squibs are bad CGI. The creatures get shot at and then take too long to fall down. Not because they keep coming but more along the lines of the actor forgot to fall. Because of the poor acting and poor pacing, none of the deaths matter to you. They just died. This also lacked the gore or the vicarious thrills that one could find in an 80s horror movie which made them worth watching.

The film’s internal logic is shaky at first. It is said that the townsfolk left and were killed by these creatures. Did they leave at night or just set up shop right next door? These things do not travel by horseback. Apparently there are underground dwellers. Do they have burrows throughout the west, and a very intricate system they could follow the wagontrain or whatever of the assorted townsfolk? And based on when the character of Lucky (Robert LaSardo) died it appears that they indeed came out during the day. 

I’m not even sure who the main character was. I assumed it was going to be Dirk but that didn’t work out. I assumed it was gonna be one of the two people seeking the outlaws. That didn’t work out either. Those two townsfolk at the end that barely matter? Those are the main characters mostly because of extraneous material.

The ending is rough. Bad CGI and worse acting. It is meant to be big but is silly. A few sticks of dynamite and a big explosion done on a computer. This was a movie made on the fly based on an outline and not a script. Or that is the appearance.

Night of the Tommyknockers is an okay idea done incompetently. It could’ve been a guilty pleasure. If you decide to waste your time viewing it you should make it your secret shame.