Hundra

• Co-Written and Directed by Matt Cimber
• August 1, 1983

A fierce warrior woman raised to despise the influence of men takes a vow of revenge after the slaughter of her people until one day she finds love. I think that is the plot.

I find that there’s not very much I can write about Hundra. Once I stepped away from viewing it what there is to discuss is a thimble’s worth dumped into a gallon container. There is a certain level of fun present but not much beneath that in terms of story. Worse, this movie is largely forgettable. It is quite the strain to recall details.

The acting can best be described as wooden with moments of ‘campy’. The direction is almost listless. What action there is would generally be greeted with a shrug. Sometimes flaws like thee can create a watchable or even good movie though not in the way intended by those involved. Cinema is littered with poorly made films that are great in a way no one making it was trying for. A prime example is the intended buddy action film Samurai Cop that is perhaps one of the funniest unintended comedies ever! Hundra in comparison is just weak.

Our hero Hundra (Laurene Landon) tries to be a tough talking badass, but Laurene Landon does not have the voice or the presence to pull such strength off. As an actress she has her limits and the needs of this part exceeded them. Her voice is too high to sound tough and she lacks an appearance of confidence when she is simply standing. Though she handles a horse well, her use of weapons is awkward.

Laurene Landon is a pretty face from the 80s with acting chops that are somewhat questionable even in a good feature. She certainly has a look, but not necessarily the ability to carry a movie. She was an actress that needed support. Not an insult. It is just that not everybody is cut out to be the central player.

With times changing, 80s films often tried to be more socially aware. Sometimes they got it right but here it could be a bit clunky. This is definitely an attempted feminist story, but that message is poorly conveyed. Landon cannot sell that message. Given her delivery you expect her to coyly giggle and walk with a bounce to highlight her…assets.

It is a film that takes much of its aesthetic and even music from the classic Schwarzenegger film Conan the Barbarian. It may be composed by Ennio Morricone but sounds like Basil Poledouris. While there’s no Riddle of Steel, the costuming and general look feels right out of Conan. Even Hundra’s village is in a similar setting to young Conan’s yet this movie has none of the deeper substance found there.

I know this has developed a Cult Classic status, but I am befuddled as to how. It stumbles from moment to moment, and you can easily get lost over what this film is tacitly about. The main character goes about liberating women with the girls running, well, like girls. They are a hair’s breadth away from the Swedish Bikini Team. Then there is the liberal costuming of barbarian bikinis like the costuming department raided a post-Halloween sale at Spirit Halloween. Conversely the male costumes like lie SOME effort was put forward.

The soundtrack is excellent given the person behind it and who he was imitating. It’s just the story that’s not good. You have a very weak narrative in a visually strong environment. With a different actress in the lead and a bit of filler (something I am generally against) for the script I feel it could deserve the status it holds.

What should be an action-adventure fantasy, even if it has something it is trying to put forward, is boring. There’s a lot more talking than there are sword fights. This is all brought to the screen with an excessive use of slow motion. Without that it would barely reach the 90-minute mark.

I know Hundra has fans, but I’m not one of them. It’s a curiosity, but not one that is necessary to view.